March 8, 2010
“I don’t think it’s supposed to happen this way but our giddiness is beginning to hurt.” Those are the words of Uncle Wonkles, guitar player and singer of the comedy music duo, The Stretchlinks. He’s referring to a rare level of joy that when prolonged can cause physical pain.
November 26, 2009
Hilarious lung thievery in this rare Stretchlinks, Nugget Of Wonderness entitled, “You Stole My Lung”. More lunatic, spoken word comedy improv from Heinous and Wonkles.
February 6, 2010
Enjoy this sweet country bluegrass classic “Deep River Blues” by the legendary artist, Doc Watson. More Links’ To Love video!
February 22, 2010
Pelosi refers to a little known genetic study funded by the National Science Foundation that has conducted extensive gene profiling of many government officials including both houses of congress
January 19, 2010
After years of rumor and speculation, ukulele legend Heinous Rynz has broken his mysterious silence and admitted responsibility for the invention of the “Missionary Position”.
January 31, 2010
Today, the elusive singer and writer of the comedy duo, The Stretchlinks rests casually atop a formidable stack of broken reel to reel tape machines piled in the corner of his Burbank, CA office slurring his way through an elliptical but amusing theory about America’s troubles – and perhaps some of his own.
January 9, 2010
Are humans the only animals to show signs of boredom? Apparently not. According to Clevelander and part time animal behaviorist, Heinous Rynz, mammals display boredom-like behaviors much like human beings.
January 9, 2010
The comedy music duo known as The Stretchlinks recently announced they had evidence that identifies the origins of the schoolyard prank known as “The Wedgy”, or “Wedgie”.
Dear Stretchheads! Please comment. We need your elasticity!
Rynes, type up the lyrics yourself if you don’t want ‘em butchered. Unbelievable. Wait…I see a schnauzer…gotta run.
I like cheese. Cheese in my belly belly. But not on the bed. Cheese goes in my belly belly.
Dear Jay,
A little known fact. Cheese was invented by the Eskimo. The cows were kept frozen until they needed milking, really a much more efficient system vs. today’s 2x day dairyman routine. The Links are pleased that you like cheese. Thanks for sharing!
Dear Stevie Ray,
My sincere apologies for incorrectly reinterpreting the ancient lyric. Thank you for your deep concern. It is fans like you that keep the Linky elastic alive, honest and true. My best, W.
Dear Steve “Living-like an-animal” Ray,
Fear not for I have indeed begun to type the lyrics again and to illustrate my commitment to authenticity, I even saw fit to note that the infamous line”Heh-geh-geh-geh-geh-a-goo-goo-goo” must be sung “with conviction”.
Stay in touch!!! -heinous-
Dearest Jay,
I’ve seen fit to organize your obsession into the format of a Haiku:
I like cheese in my
belly but not on the bed
cheese goes to belly
Brilliant!
You rang?
Stretch Your Head,,,
p6
In 2007, managed populations of European honey bees experienced substantial declines. Uncle Wonkles just trying to do his part! SAVE THE BEES!
Though I know your songs involve mostly a lot of ukulele picking and wanging away on broken, untuned, exotic instruments, do you think you could still provide some basic ukulele chord arrangements for those of us who would like to play songs like “I Hang Around” while sitting around the campfire with groups of little girls on sleep-overs in the woods?
Also, what browser am I supposed to be using? Or did you just fuck up the coding and don’t care?
..which is why I made my request here on the “Stretchlinks Podcast #8: Geebles Was His Name – yummy funny” page instead of a more appropriate comment site. I can’t read a fucking thing.
You fucks.
Both of you. Fuckheads both. I mean it. Now give me those chords. Assholes. I’m not kidding. Shit asses. Now! I mean it! And fix the goddamn coding! Fix it! You fucks. Both of you.
Thanks. Love the music.
Dear PGWHAT?
Bees should be respected. They often get the short end of the stick. Don’t know why I have an affinity for the darn things, just find them appealing – as long as they don’t buzz into my open ear canal or nothin’. Thx for your words of encouragement!
Bill,
Jeepers, those chords must be super important to ya’. Well, if it’s uke chording then Heinous will have to weigh in. I’ll give him a nudge to see if he’s ok to share his ancient Chinese secrets. We here at the podcast view on Safari or Firefox and seem to get ok results, but if you are having troubles on another browser please let us know which a one that is so that we might test drive that bad boy. The worse thing in the world is a pissed off web browser. After your code-vexed venting, the kind words are much appreciated “wanging away” sounds so sweet, mellifluous even.
I’m using IE 8.
…Both of you!
Bill
PS. I don’t know if you watched Dateline NBC tonight or not. But I thought the Polish women was innocent and the Internet lover did the murder.
PPS. I mean it!