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The Stretchlinks

Heinous Rynz and Uncle Wonkles, the alternative comedy duo known as the Stretchlinks, were born in a shoe. Not an ordinary shoe, but one filled with joy and laughter – there was some spittle in there as well but only around the heel and laces. Since happiness and laughing felt natural to them they decided to continue doing just that. So, they mowed lawns, played ukulele and guitar, smiled broadly and guffawed for a solid 20 years. The more they wallowed in their mirth, the more America began to hear something clanky and odd bouncing about the vast mountain ranges, wheat fields and turnstiles of this great republic. Soon their amusemental prowess became so strong, so visceral, that fans and bystanders were knocked to the ground, some regrettably requiring urgent medical aid. After the presses’ flashbulbs cooled and the exciting lawsuits dwindled away, the two started a podcast and became instant media tycoons. Today they both reside in homes that sport running water, painted walls and forced air heating systems.

The Stretchlinks Podcast

Heinous and Wonkles have been gazing at the bottoms of their musical souls for far too long. Now is their moment to pollute another generation with their incessant caterwauling. This time its a giddy cross-continent dollop from Cleveland and San Francisco! Listen in to a lightheaded peek down memory lane as the boys clumsily dust off old tracks, read listener mail, introduce rare “Nuggets Of Wonderness” and bask in a lovable “Don’t Touch That Feces” ranting. Its the first ever Stretchlinks Podcast, so enjoy the classics and a few new ditties to boot.

Be Nice

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The Fresh Stuff

Heinous Rynz Coins YouTube “America’s Time Machine”

April 23, 2010

Heinous Rynz Coins YouTube “America’s Time Machine”

Ukulele master, Stretchlinks member and cultural philosopher Heinous Rynz can often be found sipping ice tea from a large brandy snifter, strumming his uke and waxing poetic about the evolution of society and the deeper meanings of social media.

Stretchlinks News: Comedy Music Duo Ready Best Of Album

March 8, 2010

Stretchlinks News: Comedy Music Duo Ready Best Of Album

“I don’t think it’s supposed to happen this way but our giddiness is beginning to hurt.” Those are the words of Uncle Wonkles, guitar player and singer of the comedy music duo, The Stretchlinks. He’s referring to a rare level of joy that when prolonged can cause physical pain.

Nugget Of Wonderness: You Stole My Lung

November 26, 2009

Nugget Of Wonderness: You Stole My Lung

Hilarious lung thievery in this rare Stretchlinks, Nugget Of Wonderness entitled, “You Stole My Lung”. More lunatic, spoken word comedy improv from Heinous and Wonkles.

Links’ To Love: Doc Watson “Deep River Blues”

February 6, 2010

Links’ To Love: Doc Watson “Deep River Blues”

Enjoy this sweet country bluegrass classic “Deep River Blues” by the legendary artist, Doc Watson. More Links’ To Love video!

Stretchlinks News: Heinous Rynz admits invention of The Missionary Position

January 19, 2010

Stretchlinks News: Heinous Rynz admits invention of The Missionary Position

After years of rumor and speculation, ukulele legend Heinous Rynz has broken his mysterious silence and admitted responsibility for the invention of the “Missionary Position”.