Enjoy the importance of leadership and shoes in this rare Stretchlinks comedy video nugget entitled, “With A Big Shoe”. Features appearances by the Presidents Club – all living presidents: George H.W. Bush, George W. Bush, Barack Obama, Bill Clinton and Jimmy Carter. CLICK HERE TO WATCH!
Hilarious lung thievery in this rare Stretchlinks, Nugget Of Wonderness entitled, “You Stole My Lung”. More lunatic, spoken word comedy improv from Heinous and Wonkles.
Do Wah Do Wah Do Wah
music and lyrics © 1989
The Stretchlinks
When I first saw Wanda, she was crying in a laundromat.
She had put her favorite wool sweater in one of the dryers
and I volunteered to get it out for her.
But in what the owner described as “The most grusome and
uncanny laundering mishap he’d ever seen”, I lost three fingers
on my left hand.
She rushed me to the hospital and we were married six weeks later.
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We got a 25 hundred dollar out of court settlement from the
laundromat which helped us move into a trailer park near a
factory where I got a job working a drill press.
I bought a Chevy Impala at a police auction for 500 dollars.
It ran beautifully, but the radio only got A.M.
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We called Wanda’s parents and told them “We’ve Made it!”
Everthing was going great until I caught her “doing it” with a
seventeen-year-old Puerto Rican kid.
I beat her up pretty bad that night, so she left me and moved in
with her brother. At work I lost two more fingers.
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I heard through a friend that Wanda’s got a job at a drive-in
movie theater. She sells tickets for the most part, but when
they get real busy she helps behind the candy counter.
She makes around $4.75 an hour, and with what she steals
from the cash register I guess she does all right.
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Me? Well I roam around a lot. Doing a little bit of this, a little bit
of that. I went to join the military but they told me I didn’t have enough
fingers.
I tried to call Wanda once, but her brother answered the phone
so I just hung up
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Some people say that life chews you up and spits you out. And
many would say that my life has been somewhat of a hardluck
story.
I don’t know. But I try not to dwell too much on the past. I’m working
in a butcher shop now where they have a lot of sharp tools. It’s been
three weeks and I haven’t lost any fingers yet. Who knows…maybe
things are looking up.
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Do-Wah Do-Wah Do-Wah, etc….